I Don’t Want You for Your Money
Jan 15th, 2008 by Carlos
When I met my fiancée around three years ago (way before I became financially awake), I was not in the best of financial circumstances. Not that I was a crack addict trying to sell my TV to get my next score or anything, but things just weren’t looking too promising. It’s still amazing to me that she even considered going out with me.
For one, I didn’t have a job. I was going to grad school full time and my parents were paying all my bills. At the time I had a budget of $50/week for all non-food related activities like going to the movies or going to see a ballgame. At the time I knew it wasn’t a lot, but it didn’t feel like I was suffering.
I lived in an efficiency apartment: I had no idea what an efficiency was until after I had moved in—I always thought I lived in a studio. I was wrong. A studio has the kitchen in a separate room, while I had the kitchen along one of the walls of my room (which was my apartment).
I had no plan: Other than finishing my MA in Writing I had no idea what was in store for me. No thoughts of the future, no great ambitions, nothing. Lets get one thing clear: I wasn’t sitting on the couch eating potato chips and smoking week—but I just wasn’t out there actively trying to make my situation better. I guess a good word to describe me at the time is comfortable.
So how did I manage to get M to see past all of that? I still don’t know. I mean, not being materialistic is one thing, but isn’t there a limit to it?
The first time I asked her over to my place, telling her I’d make dinner, she came over to my cramped room and I made her some spicy chicken with rice. We sat on the floor since the only furniture I had at the time (granted, I had just moved to Chicago a few months before) was my bed and some bookshelves. It never dawned on me to feel shame or anxiety over all this. Why? I have no idea. Call me lucky, I guess.
Dating and money can be really complicated and superficial, especially since that’s the number 1 thing that couples fight about. Do you have any good or really bad (those are usually funnier) stories about money and meeting new people?
