I Hate My Real Estate Agent
I know that sounds kinda harsh, but after last week I think it’s pretty clear that I need to fire my real estate guy.
Here is the timeline:
We start going out to see places earlier this year. Everything feels fine, except for the fact that he’s obviously used to showing more upscale homes. Upscale as in millions of dollars. We almost feel like he’s doing us a favor “slumming around” to the places we can afford. But he took us on, right? So we’re full steam ahead.
We see some places we like, but we can’t really afford. We see some places we can afford, but don’t really like. So we keep seeing places. Makes sense, right?
We see a place we REALLY like. He picks up on this and puts pressure on us to buy it, saying it’s an amazing deal and the time is right.
We struggled with the decision, but eventually realized it was beyond our means—even though our agent got the price down considerably. Our thinking: why show us something so far out of our range that even when you negotiate down is still too high?
After that things got a little tense: we started picking up on a vibe that was like “just buy something already, I’m a busy guy that needs to show $3 million dollar houses. This isn’t worth it to me.” So we try to say to him that hey, if you’re done with us then that’s cool, we can move on.
No big deal. We don’t want to feel like he’s doing us a favor every time we go out. He laughs it off and says he’s shown us over 60 places already (which is NOT true) and that we’ve pretty much seen everything there is to see out there.
I decide to send a very nice email that basically says, “You know what, thanks a lot, but we’re going to take a break from looking right now.” Our thinking: we really do need a break and next year when we start up we’ll definitely give him a call. After all, he’s good at what he does.
Then we get the now-infamous email. It basically says: “I have shown you a TON of places and I want to be compensated for all that work, so make sure to sign my name to any place you go to. And between you and me, your wife always freaks out when we see a place you like, it’s her fault.”
That’s when I lost it. I was about to send a scathing email that dropped all the pleasantries that my mom and dad taught me since I was a kid—I was pissed off. I showed the email to my wife and she just laughed it off, “Well, we’re done with him.”
She wasn’t angry, but I sure was—who on earth writes a client and blames their wife for something with the caveat of “between you and me”?
Suffice to say that we will not be using this guy any more. If we wants compensation, he can go out and earn it like the rest of us. Apparently he needs a quick refresher on two basic tenets: “the customer is always right” and “you only get paid if there’s a sale.”
Awesome image by Gumuz
October 12th, 2009 at 10:18 am
Oh my goodness! Who does this guy think he is? If he actually wanted to make some commission off of you, maybe he should have taken you to houses that were REALISTIC?
Also, my boyfriend and I worked with a realtor for well over a year and a half before I was the one who ended up buying a house. He was awesome to both of us and firmly believed that when the time was right, the house would happen. He sent us MLS listings for houses that were appropriate for us, even though it didn’t net him the same commissions as the more expensive houses. His philosophy was that when the time came for us to upgrade to a more expensive home, hopefully we’d come back to him.
You don’t need to put up with this guy. Also, if he’s associated with a larger firm of agents, it might be worth shooting an email to someone over his head. I’d never say another word to this idiot again.
October 12th, 2009 at 10:22 am
Nut, you’ve got to admit, that’s pretty funny! What’s the wife freaking out about anyhoo? Is she the balancing weight that tells you not to get too excited about something? I think your wife is a Saint actually for being this way.
Don’t listen to realtors. Just put him on ignore.
October 12th, 2009 at 10:47 am
You need to interview real estate agents to see which fits what you are looking for. Just because a friend recommends a person does not mean he/she will fit with you and your wife’s style. Maybe you should just do a tear down or find an empty lot and build to what you want.
October 14th, 2009 at 12:28 am
I kind of felt this way last month when looking for a used car. Me and my girlfriend say our budget is “Out the door $8,000 max” and the guy is showing us cars much higher than our price range around $10,000. It angered me because the guy wasted our time showing us cars we couldn’t afford, and kept saying “it’s in your price range” when we flat out asked what the price was during a test drive. Then when rejected their offer (still above our price range) they pulled out a list of more cars that was actually in line with what we were looking for. At that point we just wanted to leave.
I wouldn’t blame you for not wanting to go back to the guy… seems like he just wants to get a high commission instead of you getting what you want.
October 19th, 2009 at 7:49 pm
I certainly don’t condone anyone acting the way you say he did, but I can understand his frustration. Real estate agents are people too, and when you drag them all over the place with no real intention to buy, you’re wasting valuable time that they could be using to help a couple that’s more serious about the process, marketing their own listings, or even spending time with their family. It’s easy to say “you only get paid if there’s a sale” when it’s not your time or livelihood on the line.
October 19th, 2009 at 9:17 pm
Gerald: We certainly intend to buy, but we just hadn’t found the right place yet. Part of the blame lies on him—are we supposed to buy something after seeing 60 places because 60 is a lot?
I don’t think so.
November 2nd, 2009 at 5:38 pm
You know, I’ve been experiencing a similar thing and I’m ready to get rid of my realtor at this point. I almost think getting a realtor is a beginners mistake, because on my own I can [and often do] look up the info he finds out (taxes, comps, co specs), and if I really need to see the place I can get with the seller’s agent.
I think my problem is that my realtor knows that my upper threshold is ($170K), so he’s been showing me places for $169K and nothing for less. I told him I don’t want to go that high, that I want to stay between $90k-$125k, yet I repeatedly receive updates on houses that are $149k or more.
I even send him requests to find out more about houses that ARE within my desired range, and he doesn’t get that the prices I’m sending him are the prices I want to pay. Even after I said what I want to pay! C’mon, dude–I’m not going to buy that high, and you’re just wasting BOTH your time and mine if you show me something beyond my means!
WTF?!
November 3rd, 2009 at 6:48 pm
One of the great things about the internet is the ability to leave reviews on various websites such as yellowpages.com and yahoo. I would leave a 1 star review for this agent. I’d also contact the company headquarters, not just the office he works out of. I had a lot of problems with a very lazy and unknowledgable Keller William agent (the buyers agent) who’s constant mistakes led to a lot of stress for both me as the seller and the buyer. I wrote – several times – and demanded some of the commision back and finally received it.
November 5th, 2009 at 7:28 am
You can run into rude people in any profession. If your hair dresser insults you, you change hair dressers… but you still need a hair dresser.
There are good people in every profession too and they should be bringing their expertise to the table to help you with your needs whether it’s getting your hair cut or buying a home.. shop around and find the one that cares about doing a good job and helping you accomplish what you want and need.
November 10th, 2009 at 1:20 am
I’ve often wondered about the ethics of real estate agents, as well as the logic. I recently contacted a real estate agent in Texas inquiring about buying property for investment/tax purposes. I said I wanted to spend about $100,000 and immediately they raised the antie by $25,000. what I wanted was 3bd 2bth wood floors, garage, yard. I deciided todo a little research on my own. I’m now convinced this person is on crack!!! theres plenty of property in the areas i’m looking for under $100k.
and another thing, what wrong with knocking on the door of the person who’s selling the house and saying “Hi, I’d like to buy your house and here’s how much I can pay…”
November 10th, 2009 at 6:43 am
Megan: Seriously, what is wrong with that? I would think an owner would love to get someone just randomly walking in to check the place out…as long as the owner isn’t a young woman home alone or something. But my wife but the nix on that plan…she thought it was pretty out of the ordinary!
November 11th, 2009 at 1:44 pm
I bought a house this summer and have to tell you the best thing to do is look at the MLS listings yourself online every night and find ones that are in your price range and look good to you then send that list of numbers to your agent and ask him to look them up and get you the addresses. Once you get the addresses you can do a ‘drive by’ without your agent. This gives you the opportunity to first check out the location, the outside of the home and the neighbors without taking up the time of the agent. You narrow your own search down by doing a drive by and then you call your agent to get appointments to look at the insides. This saves everybody a lot of heartache as I instantly knew I wasn’t interested in a house if I didn’t like what the neighbors house looked like.
December 2nd, 2009 at 7:33 am
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March 10th, 2010 at 12:42 am
Dear Nut, I’m a real estate agent and I read your post with perhaps a different perspective. Why did you see so many houses that were out of your price range? Why did you make an offer on a house that was out of your price range? While I don’t agree with the email he sent you, I can understand his frustration. You are with all due respect an unrealistic buyer who is probably looking for a “steal”. Yet you are the same client who wants full market value when you sell your own property. Agents don’t get paid until when and if a transaction occurs. During this time clients are often ungrateful and less than polite. A more successful agent would have recognized that you were not a serious buyer and left you to your own devices. Another perspective I’m confident you won’t take to heart.
March 10th, 2010 at 5:40 am
Frances,
You make some good points, and for the first year and a half we probably weren’t ready to buy. He later told me it was partly his fault for not seeing that and saying something.
We thought we were ready to buy but really, we weren’t. He hung in there and we eventually came around. I think another thing that happened is we put a lot of thinking and reasoning into our decision. And hey, it’s a pretty big deal and we wound up in a place we love.
So if I had to do it over again, I probably wouldn’t do anything different.
March 10th, 2010 at 12:21 pm
Dear Nut,
Your agent apologized to you for accepting you at your word when you indicated that you were ready, willing and able to buy in the price range you chose to look at and make an offer on one of those properties that you later said “was beyond your means”.
okay.
Successful agents learn to recognize buyers who are less than forthcoming (for whatever reason) and focus their attention on buyers who are self-aware and honest.
The latter type of buyer is indeed valuable. Relationships of all types are typically based on reciprocity. A client that is forthcoming about what he or she can actually afford and is honest about their intentions will garner the attention of a good agent who will be patient, diligent and focused on their goals.
My sympathies to the unfortunate agent you treated with such discourtesy.
March 11th, 2010 at 6:22 am
Frances,
Here’s the thing about the whole process: in retrospect I can see that we weren’t ready. But at the time, we were ready. I would’ve sworn it to you. We were ready to buy a highrise near the lake that needed work.
We were convinced of it.
Looking back, it’s obvious we weren’t. But isn’t that part of the unknown/hand holding that comes with being a first-time homebuyer?
I think the best evidence is that he admitted as much to us and we also apologized for dragging this along so much. We’re both glad we waited and we’re both glad it’s over.
March 11th, 2010 at 12:31 pm
Dear Nut,
That’s the first time that I’ve heard you apologized to your agent.
Your initial public tirade contained no self-analysis or responsibility on your part.
There’s much to be said for civility and integrity. Had I known of your apology I wouldn’t have felt compelled to write.
Your continued expectation that your agent, someone you did not have a personal history with, should have known you better than you know yourself, is in my view unrealistic.
At best it sounds as if your agent is not one of the top agents in town and therefore didn’t feel obliged to cut you loose much sooner than most successful agents would have.
It’s not my intention to sound too critical of you. I think your actions and writings are common to many of the general public.
Speak first, think later. So goes our nation.
With sincerity, best wishes in your new home.
March 12th, 2010 at 6:05 am
No worries Frances.
March 20th, 2010 at 4:57 pm
I don’t understand these remarks about how the agent should have “cut her loose.” Please. She explained up front what her price range was. Why didn’t the agent follow that instead of showing her better houses? Agents make a fat commission — what is it? 3 -6 percent? For driving someone around and then filling out paperwor, I think that’s a great deal.
My first agent who sold me my house five years ago patiently took me to homes until I found one I liked. I don’t remember how many I saw, but there were quite a few — adn I loved my final choice.
Now, in my second purchase I am having nothing but problems — exactly of the kind described above. I described the area I wanted along with the price range. I even mentioned that I wanted walking distance to the metro. What my first agent showed me were homes a good $200k beyond my price range. Yes, I coudl affrord it, but no, I didn’t want to go that high — especially when I could have better value for money elsewhere. He also lied and said there were no homes on the market in a specific location I asked about and then proceeded to show me homes further away which were hundreds of thousands of dollars more. He then tried to convince me how close to the metro it was by startnig at the metro and then driving the house. It was a good 15 minute drive. Yes, I would love to spend an hour walking each way to get to the metro.
As soon as I perked up about one home in the higher range, which I thought, ‘might work,” he then began forwarding multiple listings in that area of the same range in an area that I had informed him would be a horrible commute for me — all the while homes in my price range and ideal location were sitting on the market.
Once I found out through my own research, I cut him immediately.
My second agent is more on the ball, but I also get this sense from her of “just buy already.” Gee, I have only been out with her once and for an hour. She is showing me great matches, but she interrupts and cuts me off and acts as though she is so put out having to show homes. While she is very competent, I wonder why I would want to give a commission to a person with this level of disrepect. Can’t she at least feign civility for the short time I am with her?
Agents just want to slam us into houses, take the moneye, and leave. A good agent puts his client first and tries to make them feel comfortable and to find a good match for them.
April 14th, 2010 at 6:31 am
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April 18th, 2010 at 2:57 am
99% of real-estate agents are greedy, lazy, incompetent and unprincipled low-lifes. Yours actually sounds much better than average!
April 19th, 2010 at 5:50 am
@Marista: I must stick up for my broker since we did wind up working all this out in the end. You can read more about it here.
July 27th, 2010 at 6:12 am
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August 29th, 2011 at 8:03 pm
This is a fabulous discussion. I have to find somewhere to begin. Please sstand by.
December 4th, 2011 at 10:19 pm
He’s a jerk. Doesn’t mean all buyers agents are bad in principle. Just means you should have fired this guy and moved on a long time ago.
February 13th, 2012 at 8:26 pm
I’m having the same problem,My agent wants me to buy properties she likes and tries to bid to last penny of my savings like I don’t have to pay closing costs, ins etc. Than theres a property that’s nice in my price range she wants to low ball and I loose the bid. 20 homes in my price range ready to go see them she calls and has a doctors appt. than can’t contact her for 2 weeks. Called her broker and he has to find out what’s going on and I almost lost my earnest money cause she was on vacation. I’m the one searching for the houses on the internet. She’s to lazy to run a property check when i find the properties. why do we have to use there good for nothing but putting the bid in. smh
February 28th, 2012 at 9:16 am
Hello All, and I hope you don’t beat me up as I am a Realtor (in the Chicagoland area) and although I didn’t read all of these posts, I will tell you there are a lot of things said here I agree with.
Here is what I feel went wrong: 1. You should not pursue a home based on purchase price, instead based on your monthly budget (assuming you qualify). When you got approved for a loan you may have been told $250k, which may equal $1800/month, but if your comfort is $1,500 per month, we take taxes + insurance+PMI (if applic.) subtract off the top and what is left is the amount for your mortgage. This will determine purchase price and will fluctuate as taxes on homes vary. Taxes vary all over the place so do the math. If $1000 = $7/month payment, then $100 more in monthly taxes means the home should be $14,000 less. These numbers matter.
2. It is the Realtor’s responsibility to educate the public as to the process, approach, realistic and not, and if there are 60 homes to show you and they are all missing something, then I am guessing you selected the homes to view, and not him. I say this because as a Realtor we pay attention to the subtle comments clients make during showings to filter what they do not like. “I wish it had a balcony”, “No garage?”, etc. The MLS is an awesome query based system that allows Realtors to really slice and dice the data to get you on the right path. Your agent should always team with you to help find mutual solutions. If you want a fireplace, whirlpool, and a tandem room, that may be really hard to find. Work together to find the right alternatives available in the market.
3. Communication – its is everyone’s adult responsibility to realize that all parties in the deal are human with real lives and challenges, and if there is any concern, open the communication to reduce misunderstanding before resentment sets in.
4. Not using a Realtor – sure you can, however due to the abilities mentioned above and a continuous process of filtering, data access, real time MLS homes, scheduling, driving, coordinating and qualifying homes before you view them, your exposure as a buyer is 100x quicker, should be more of a safe and educated experience, and you should be able to rely on your agent as a shepherd guiding you though each and every step.
5. ….and finally the pressure. My style is consultative and I make it a point that it is my client’s journey to improve their lives, never to improve my commission. I think it is pathetic if agents try to up the price to make an extra dollar, if that is what happened. However, I will say that there are situations where the inventory of homes people want to buy are simply above their means, and at that point the client reaches for higher hanging fruit. I find myself 9 out of 10 times reminding clients of the budget they told me to maintain. The higher they go the more they find and harder it is to reach. It has to fit the budget or you’ll be calling me in a year asking short sale options.
So, the moral of the story is that all agents vary, however stop shopping by purchase price, but instead determine your MONTHLY budget, and stick to it. Realtors are not typically SALES people when representing buyers. Their job is not to sell you a home, as you will by what you like. Their job is to guide and protect you during this process, while giving you significant resources of homes filtered to your buying plan (need, location, size, etc), and information about the property once YOU find the one you love. And finally, as in any relationship, should resentment or concern arise – address it. People are not mind readers and if they are overwhelmed, stressed, maybe the agent is facing his/her own financial hardships, etc. – have an honest sit down and discuss what the issue and forward moving steps are. Mutual understanding will make for an excellent home buying team experience. Good luck!